The Highlight That Proves Tender-Footed Dan Marino Isnt A Top 20 Quarterback Of All Time

I dont care about the stats. I dont care about the biggest arm of all time. I dont care about any of that. There’s two facts that I know about Dan Marino.

1. This highlight is the worst display of football of all time. I think this is somehow worse than the butt fumble. Sure, Dan scored here but it’s worse.

“Chaps! Chaps! You live in Texas! You dont know what it’s like to run in the snow! It’s very tricky to get used to. It can be slippery! Plus, Dan played quarterback for Miami. It’s warm down there so he was unaccustomed to the snow!.”

True. But, Dan also played college ball at Pitt so he should be used to the cold.

“Fair point! He should know better! Sissy boy Dan!”

We dont say sissy anymore. That’s offensive.

“Ok! Another good point. Can we have an America’s Funniest Video type video where people are falling on the frozen ground? I love those unlike Dan Marino.”

What do you think? Roll that beautiful bean footage.

2. He was retired by our beloved Jaguars in the biggest ass kicking retirement game of all time. 62-7 for a send off game. YIKES!